My current drug dependency: Part 2

Posted: April 22, 2010 in ALL ABOUT ME
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My drug of choose as of lately has been my mother’s 2008 Nissan Altima.  If you are a follower of my writing, then you are well aware of my issues with drug dependency.  My last battle with drugs came in the form of a highly addicted relationship with nasal spray a few months ago,
click here to read.

I am thankful everyday that when I was younger, I choose to never smoke a single cigarette in my life, because I bet you that I would fucking love them today based on my addictive tendencies.  It would be so cute, I would be hanging outside in the back porch with my girlfriend as we smoked together, instead of me staying inside on the couch, while she goes and sits outside by herself  and smokes in utter silence.  Kerri seems to talk on her cell phone a lot while she smokes by herself, and I feel that it is slightly due to the fact that I have effectively created a void in her life whenever she chooses to smoke.  I hope this will motivate her to quit someday.  But the point of this blog today is for my addictions, not her’s so I need to get back to the Nissan Altima dependency issues I am currently dealing with.

My mother wanted to leave her car at my house while she was away in Florida during her vacation.  I dropped her off at the airport last Friday, and when I came home there were already two cars in my driveway, my car and Kerri’s car.  I decided to park my mom’s car behind my jeep, since I did not want to block Kerri in, but at the same time, I did not want to have to deal with parking my moms car on the street, then pulling my Jeep out into the street, then pulling my mom’s Altima into the front of the driveway, and then finally pulling my Jeep up behind her car.  That was a lot to write to explain why I did not want to do it, so I hope it explains why I did not want to deal with it at the time, basically I was fucking lazy, and I thought that it really didn’t matter at all…………or so I thought.

Little did I know, that by me not dealing with this slight inconvenience with parking the cars properly, I have effectively transferred my addictive tendencies regarding my nasal spray dependency, directly into a 2008 Nissan Altima dependency.

I guess I owe you an explanation.  I have a 2000 Jeep Wrangler.  I love it.  But it is nice for very different reasons than a 2008 Nissan Altima.  My jeep is nice in good weather with the top down but it is a bumpy, less comfortable ride, than say a nice new car would provide.  I enjoy the Jeep for its “outdoorsy” experience, and I am always guaranteed at least one friendly “Jeep Wave”, from a fellow Jeep Wrangler owner as we drive by each other.

If you do not know about the “Jeep Wave” then this will be your crash course in its existence.  Any time a Jeep Wrangler owner is driving their car down the road, and he or she passes another Jeep owner driving in the other direction towards that driver, the two Jeep Wrangler owners will wave to each other, I would say on at least 85 percent of the occasional situations.  I say this statistic just based on personal experience, because I seem to wave to more Jeep Wrangler owners who also wave back, as opposed to waving to Jeep Wrangler owners who do not wave when I wave.  It is not always myself that initiates the Jeep Wave to the other Jeep owner, other Jeep owners take pride in their Jeep ownership as well as myself.

Like this one time when I was at the barbershop, which is rare on its own, and I was sitting in the waiting area to get my hair cut.  This older dude, who I have never scene before in my life walks into the barbershop, and proceeds to ask “Who owns the Blue Jeep outside?”  I answer “I do…”, assuming that I am either blocking him in, or my headlights are on.  He proceeds to tell me to go to his Jeep website which caters to all Jeep lovers, where they can show pictures, or share Jeep experiences in life.  He tells me the website again, and then he leaves.  I forget the name of the website within minutes, and more than likely seconds after he leaves the barbershop.  I thought that this would be my last experience with this individual, but once again I found myself being mistaken in life.

A few weeks later, I am driving down a road which was close to my barbershop, and a Jeep is driving towards me on the other side of the road.  As we pass each other, we do the “Jeep Wave”, and then I realized to who I was waving to.  It was the man from the barbershop, and I had instantly remembered him.  The very funny thing about this situation was that:

  • He had a “VERY STRONG and full of pride, Jeep Wave”

and

  • He nodded his head towards me as he did the wave, with an almost glimmer in his eye, showing me that he did indeed remember who I was as well.

How many other car owners can say that on any given day that you are driving, whenever you see an individual driving the same model car as you, that the both of you automatically know to wave to each other?  The Jeep wave suits me very well in life.  I like the fact that I communicate with total strangers with a friendly gesture on an everyday basis.

There are some rules to which I follow with the “Jeep Wave”, and I want to share them with you:

  1. I only do it if we are in passing of each other in the opposite direction
  2. I do not do it if another Jeep and I are both traveling in the same direction
  3. I do not do it if I am on the highway
  4. I sometimes do it if someone else is trying to pull out of a parking lot onto the main road to which I am driving on, but sometimes I think this is a bad idea and a bad habit to get used to.  The reason being that I am acknowledging that I see the Jeep when I choose to wave at the individual, but I am not acknowledging them to the point of considering to slow down for them, to allow them to get out of the parking lot, and onto the main road in front of me.

Sometimes I am drunk or such, and in the passenger seat of a friend’s car,  this is when I might be vulnerable to ridicule if it was made apparent to what I have been known to occasionally do because of “Jeep Wave habit”.  If a Jeep Wrangler is driving by me, while I am in the “not right frame of mind” while I am sitting in the passenger seat of my friends car, I will wave to the person driving the Jeep Wrangler, usually due to habit, and also due to lack of proper thinking, due to my inebriated state.  So I am probably one of the few individuals on this planet that gives the Jeep Wave to people when I am not in a Jeep, and on top of this I am not even driving the vehicle that I am in.  These instances are rare, but they have happened, and I can only assume that it would take me a long time to find a Jeep owner who does the same thing as I do on occasion.  I am sure that it happens with other Jeep owners on rare occasions as well, but finding a Jeep owner and relating with each other on this unique behavior, may never take place during my life.  I can feel hopeful that such a conversation could take place, it is always a good idea to dream big…….maybe if I just choose to remember that guy’s website, I could reach out to all Jeep owners and ask if I am alone……..or are there others out there that are like me?

Back to my drug of choice: my mothers 2008 Nissan Altima.  The next day (Saturday) when I woke up, I had some errands to run and the weather was not too great outside, so it was not an enjoyable day for the Jeep.  Thankfully I blocked my Jeep in my driveway with my mothers car.  I said, “Why not? I am going to indulge in the Altima today”

I used the Altima for my errands and I was instantly addicted.  It drove fast, it drove with good acceleration, it looked really nice, it had a key-less ignition, and it had a very comfortable interior, everything that my Jeep does not have.  I was fucking high as shit in this Nissan Altima, and I knew I had just effectively opened a huge bag of crack, and I had the ability to binge on that crack for the next week, with the only major repercussion being that I would have to fill the gas tank back up, so I thought “big fucking deal”.

Every time that I used my mothers Altima that day, I would come home and block in my Jeep in the driveway, thus giving me an excuse to just use the Altima again the next time, instead of having to do the awful task of moving two cars with only one individual doing the tasks for both cars.  So my drug habit continued because it was nice, convenient, and I have no problem admitting that I just liked using this drug.  By myself, with a friend, it mattered not, I just wanted to be in the Altima. I had NO DESIRE to be in the Jeep.  So this behavior continued: Saturday, turned into Sunday, Sunday turned into Monday, Monday into Tuesday, and Tuesday night I choose to binge on another drug of choice which was “LOST”, and then finally Tuesday turned into Wednesday.

Wednesday was the day that I decided would be my last binge of the Altima.  I woke up and drove it to Kerri’s work to bring her a coffee.  Upon returning home I decided to start the daunting task of possibly giving up my new drug of choice.  Since the only car in my driveway on Wednesday was my Jeep when I returned home (since Kerri is working) , I felt that I could easily park the Altima beside the Jeep, instead of behind it.  Now I have effectively taken a step in the right direction in regards to making an effort to kick this drug habit.  I had given myself a choice for the next time I have to leave the house.

Now I could say “It’s nice out, I can take the Jeep” or “I don’t care that it is nice out, I will just pimp out this drug habit one more day and still use the Altima”.  The main point was now I have at least given myself a choice.  I stood strong and I took the Jeep when I went out the next time.  Upon arriving home later that evening my drug dependency had effectively dealt with itself, just because of my choice in taking the Jeep out that afternoon.  When I returned home there were two cars in the driveway, both side by side, my mom’s Altima and Kerri’s car.  Kerri has to work the next morning, so I do not want to block her in, so I parked in the only natural spot for myself in the driveway, behind my drug of choice, my mom’s Nissan Altima.

I effectively shut and locked in my drug dependency, and did not allow for it to manifest my thoughts, motivation, or behavior.  I took control of the situation.  I am two for two in the department of quitting a serious drug habit, the first being nasal spray, and now the second being my mom’s Nissan Altima.

I am starting to think that Rehab and Detox is just a scam, based on my success of quitting without the help or assistance from either one, in each of my cases of drug dependency.  I must say that I have battled the occasional relapse with nasal spray, and unfortunately I am already aware that I will probably relapse with the Altima come this Saturday.  I need to put some gas into it to fill the tank back up to where my mother had it when she asked if she could “Park her car” in my driveway for the week.  I think when I fill the tank I am going to savor every moment of this temporary relapse that is planned to take place.  I plan on taking the long way to and from the gas station, and I might even intentionally take the wrong way to the gas station.

Some might say that I can avoid this relapse, by just giving my mother some gas money, and my response to this is “God no!!!! If I give her how much I probably owe her in gas money, she will know how much I actually fucking used the car, when she just wanted to have it parked safely at my place”………So paying my mother the gas money IS NOT an option.  I have one last binge…….it will take place this Saturday, I look forward to it deeply, I am highly considering the idea of taking high doses of NightQuil for the next three days, so I can just wake up on Saturday, and also just be done with these three days of withdrawal which I will most likely be experiencing today, tomorrow, and the day after tomorrow.

On a side note, “The Day After Tomorrow” was a fucking awful movie, as are almost all of Roland Emmerich’s movies.  This guy is not good for Hollywood.  He has made “Independence Day”, Godzilla (with Mathew Broderick), 10,000 B.C., and 2012, I have only seen two of those four, and I will not let him trick me into seeing any movie he makes ever again.  I must say that I liked “The Patriot” with my friend Mel, and I have no idea how he directed a movie that I like.

This is What Andrew Michaels is Doing Now……

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Comments
  1. Lauren G says:

    I always wonder why the “Jeep wave” never really caught on with other makes and models. Everytime I see someone who drives a volkswagon jetta, I wonder if I should start waving my arms wildly. I think I’ll try it next time, thanks to you, andy michaels. You’re a delight.

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